When I returned to this country in 1979 from the United States, I had a contact with one Gab Iheukwumere Osuagwu. Then, he was the director of news and current affairs in the then Imo Broadcasting Service. While I was in his office, up-to 3/4 obituary announcements came in. I was attracted.
When the sponsors had left, I drew his attention to the fact that our people are gradually celebrating the dead instead of lamenting over it.
In fact, I remember vividly, that the first radio commentary I wrote on 1st January 1981 was an attempt to condemn the rate at which our people are gradually celebrating the dead instead of lamenting. Today, it is an intellectual waste of time trying to infuse correct measures to curb the excesses of burial ceremonies.
As a public commentator, I have argued that there is nothing like the best burial or the best marriage ceremony as everything is relative. In such an effort, there is not much we can do other than to continue to propagate decency and sensibility into our everyday behaviour.
Today, during the Covid-19 wahala, the society was overwhelmed with countless number of burials. Indeed and in fact, our people were overwhelmed. Research has shown that there are two prominent ceremonies which standout in the Igbo culture. One is the celebration of a newborn baby. Before the arrival of the baby, the couple will prepare for the arrival.
If due to modern technology and health sciences the sex of the expected newborn is known, the couple will buy things bearing the sex of the child in mind. In fact, if it is the first child of the family, the couple will go all out in the preparation. Similarly, the couple is heralded with lots of joy
Relations, friends and well wishers from far and near will come to pay homage to the new baby. If the mother of the wife is living, she, too, will be involved in the elaborate preparation as if she is going on Pilgrimage. In some cultures, particularly the Igbo culture to my knowledge, the mother of the wife does not stay shorter than 3months depending on the circumstances and that time is to enable her tutor her daughter on how best to handle the newborn baby including the most difficult aspects of giving bath to the slippery being.
It is a well known fact that for the period of 3months of nursing the baby, the mother of the wife is usually in a good mood helping her daughter with so many domestic assignments. Of course, in Igbo culture particularly in a Christian family, circumcision takes place within this period probably within the 8th day of birth.
Probably after the mother of the wife had assisted her daughter for at least 3months, preparations will be made for her to return to her husband. Sometimes, she would go home a rejuvenated being with her looking good and putting on weight. Some daughters go extra lengths to give their mothers new hairdo. A story was told of a man who could not recognize his wife after she had gone on maternity leave (Omugwo) to her daughter’s house.
The daughter went all out and took it upon herself to make sure her mother went home looking different. She will be assailed with gifts and goodies from neighbors, friends and well wishers of her daughter and husband.
Similarly, once any family looses a member, agony and lamentation descends on the family. It will remain a gloomy and trying period for them until the dead is buried. Preparation for the burial of the dead varies from family to family, wealth and age of the dead; the availability of things to cook and eat will be unlimited.
Painfully enough, the glamorous propensities such as sewing of uniforms for members of the family, friends and well wishers, elaborate preparations including printing of posters and banners have tended to add to modern burial wastes.
What is more, family members, professional colleagues and well wishers donate cows and goats to the family in order to reduce the list of the burial expenses. But invariably, this does not reduce the burden on the immediate family member of the dead. Today, during the burial of the dead, bags and bags of rice will be cooked including several cows slaughtered.
Nobody, yes nobody would recognize any burial scene in our culture today as a burial because it is more like a carnival. This is because hired dancers, musical groups including none invited and non hired would throng the main space to celebrate the burial but non to lament over the loss. A new dimension has been added to our burial culture and that is when the children of the deceased will be asked to come and dance in order to bid farewell to their loved one who has departed.
Stories have been told that most times the children go as far as fighting over money sprayed on them while they were dancing thereby turning the scene into a fighting duel. It must be mentioned that no burial is the same because costs of burial, entertainment and everything depends on individuals. People should know that no amount of expense spent on a particular burial would return the dead.
Admittedly, depending on the age and well to do status of the dead, some members of the public must stop this preventable waste of mortgaging themselves all in order to give their loved ones a BEFITTING burial.
Our culture celebrates the arrival of a newborn baby and at the same time agonizes over the death of any family member. Therefore, we must begin now to advocate for lower burial expense because what is gone is gone and times are hard.
Nb: this page is for the promotion of Igbo tradition and culture. Therefore, my readers are free to call me on 08033919188 to ask questions on any aspect they want to know more about.
